Would You Date Someone with Untreated Bipolar Disorder?
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Dating Someone with Untreated Bipolar Personality 

If you are single, would you marry a man or woman with untreated bipolar disorder? It sound hideous and your answer is probably "NO!" Those untreated with bipolar disorder are characterized by high happy moods and low depressing moods. For some the highs can last for months and the lows can also last for months. For others, it's relative in that the highs can last for hours and the lows can last for hours. In fact in certain situations the same individual may cycle both long term and short term.

You're probably thinking, "I don't know anyone like that; so I'm safe!" And even though you think you don't know anyone like that, it's possible that you do, for dating a bipolar personality is lots of fun. They are incredibly fun to be with, creative, and make you feel like a million bucks.  Things in the past like shopping (that you've hated) become fun. As you go through a boring store the two of you are making jokes about the names of various products, stealing kisses at the back of an aisle, and frolicking about.  Bipolar personalities can be very spontaneous—flirting and kissing in public. They can't get enough of you and you can't get enough of them. 

You are their savior in so many words and they will tell you that. Their last relationship may have been abusive and you wonder how any one in their right mind could have been abusive to this wonderful person. You wonder why this incredible person hasn't already found the love of his/her life and by the same token are thanking your lucky stars for being in the right place at the right time. 

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Bipolar personalities are vivacious, beautiful or handsome, energetic, and you feel like you won the instant lottery of relationship. They are very loyal and bring you thoughtful presents and you're sure they are the masters at thoughtfulness. This is all the upside. Do you know someone like this? Listen on, there's a lot more.

On the downside, there's very little on the negative column that you can find. They are very accommodating and they make you the boss. You ask them for input because you really don't want to be the boss, but want to do things they like and appreciate. Nevertheless, whatever you say goes. They enjoy doing things with you and you enjoy the feeling of being "needed." If you're sexually active, they make you feel right at home. They are your "other half" as opposed to being a person of the opposite sex, and if you're hot to trot, they are likewise. You can't get enough of them and they can't get enough of you. You may find yourselves somewhat daring to the point of even taking risks of getting caught (by parents or children) having sex.

Send the children away for the weekend during the summer and you'll be having sex in the back yard under the moon light or in different rooms—floors, top of stairs, in the kitchen, different beds--of the house or apartment. 

Bipolar personalities generally aren't intrusive and let you know that they are simply grateful for any time you spend with them. They are easy to fall in love with and easy to think of marriage with them. It looks like you are the luckiest person in the world and that it will never end since you are truly appreciative for this wonderful being sharing his or her life with you. It can't be anything but a win-win situation. You just can't figure out how anyone in the whole wide world could have mistreated this wonderful loving person. 

They love spending time with your relatives you enjoy visiting—something you never expected.

With this incredible energy in courting, it's hard to be objective. He/she seems like the perfect match and an occasional loss of temper with his/her children is one of the few disconcerting behaviors. The temper flare is limited to someone other than you. He/she acknowledges that he/she may have overreacted and is sorry that you had to see it. They will justify the upset they feel with the child/children and by the same token feel remorse for their outburst which may include physical abuse. They will tell you that the child/children know how to push their buttons and that they do it willfully or to get attention. If no children are involved, the outbreaks of anger will be directed to another family member.

Drugs and alcohol may be of some concern. They may partake of illegal drugs or alcohol, but in more of a social way and there's no obvious evidence of it being a problem in their life. 

You want to see the best in them, so you will generally overlook this behavior and want to help them get beyond having their buttons pushed. You feel that with all they have given you in this relationship, the least you can do is help as much as you can. And you might even have a thought that you hope you can be instrumental in helping him/her before that kind of anger should ever be turned onto you. And even though you have that kind of thought, you still believe you'll somehow be immune since the individual has such high regard for you. 

Generally the person with bipolar disorder is a very responsible person, is not late for appointments, and may be very well accomplished or successful.

Some are very fastidious in cleanliness, organization, and house keeping.

All in all, except for occasional disruption of temper with other family members, you have an ideal relationship. So what is the problem?

Well, it's possible (anything is possible) that you did hit the instant million dollar lottery when it comes to relationship. But look for several factors before you leap into a marriage commitment.

Look for:

• A father or mother that had or has a problem with alcohol.

• A father or mother that has suffered from depression—especially bipolar depression.

• Physical abuse in child hood.

An earlier traumatic event such as being abandoned by lover while pregnant and making plans for marriage.

If you find any of the above, you'll want to wake from your relationship stupor and ask some serious questions about the relationship. Is this too good to be true? Might your desire to be helpful be clouding your view of the relationship? It is clearly insane to continue on towards marriage until you understand more about bipolar personalities. Understanding bipolar disorder may provide you answers to the question of what to expect after marriage.


Resource Box:

Richard Kuhns B.S.Ch.E. NGH certified, a prominent figure in the personal change field. His aim is to make it possible for anyone suspecting a potential problem in a relationship to determine if it is indeed because of a bi polar issue.
For more information please visit 
He has several websites with self help materials:
Self help mp3 downloads for you personal change and improvement plan at
How to Build and Improve Self Worth at
Stop Binging and Comfort Eating at
Over come panic disorder with agoraphobia at
Pendulums for self discovery at
Special Diet for Morgellons and Skin Parasites at


Bipolar Personality CD $19.95

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